Sunday, November 4, 2012

Fuck You, AT&T Customer Service

Last month, I bought the iPhone 5 and decided it was time to get a new number, too, a Boston number to reflect my current location. I'd had a Philadelphia number before. I stayed a loyal AT&T customer, and what do I get? They're scamming me an entire fucking month for a phone I no longer use. Fuck you, AT&T.

Backstory: I happily activated my new phone, with its shiny new number. I called AT&T Customer Service and spoke to Jason, who then passed me on to Michelle. I explained to Michelle that I had a new phone (Boston), and since the contract on my old phone (Philadelphia) had expired, I wanted to terminate that line. She assured me that the Philadelphia line would be cancelled at the end of the next billing cycle. I confirmed the date -- October 26, 2012 -- and she said there would be no charges after that day, that there would be no more wireless bill for that number, and it would simply stop working as a cell phone.

Today: I plug in the old phone to check what OS it has, and the "AT&T" text shows up on the cell bar. Confused, I called my mom. It fucking rang. The phone still fucking works, nine days after it's supposed to be a brick. WTF. I checked online for the wireless bill. Oh, look they're charging me for the next cycle, which runs from October 27 through November 26. I'm paying for a goddamned phone I'm not using, that I told them specifically that I'm not using, would you please terminate it.

I called AT&T and spoke to [mumbles], who then passed me on to someone else. Here's how it went down:

Furious Elephant: ...and I was told that this phone would stop working last month and I wouldn't have to pay anything. Now I'm seeing charges for the next billing cycle.

Customer Rep: Unfortunately, your request did not go through.

Furious Elephant: I want this line cancelled. Is there a way to backdate the cancellation?

Customer Rep: Unfortunately, I can only future-date the cancellation.

Furious Elephant: So I'm paying for two phones on AT&T, one of which I'm not using?

Customer Rep: Yes.

Furious Elephant: That seems foolish.


Furious Elephant: Look, I just want to make sure this line gets cancelled. Will it stop working on November 26?

Customer Rep: That's correct.

Furious Elephant: And is there a way for me to confirm that? Should I just call you guys again?

Customer Rep: No, you won't need to do that. It won't be able to make calls then.

Furious Elephant: Okay. What's your name?

Customer Rep: Robert.

Furious Elephant: Last time I was helped by someone named Michelle. I didn't know her last name, either.


Furious Elephant: All right. Do I need to do anything else to make sure this thing gets cancelled?

Robert: No, that's it.

Furious Elephant: Well, thanks very much.

Robert: Thank you (choking) for being a valued customer of AT&T.

- 0 -


Well, lessons learned:

  1. Get the customer rep's full name and any other identifying information to improve chances of correct perp getting screamed at for being incompetent.
  2. Kick it up to the supervisor as soon as it becomes clear you won't be helped.

I would've done the above, but I was so upset I couldn't talk. Next time I'm making Husband-elect deal with this crap. He's very good at loudly yet politely informing people that they suck at their job. That's how we got complimentary cheese and champagne at the Westin.

In conclusion: GRRRRRRRRR.


UPDATE: 11/08/2012

I sent a furious yet polite email to AT&T right after the call. I wrote out the issue and asked them not to make me call customer service again, since that doesn't work.

I guess a higher-up read the email, because the line has disappeared from the billing statement, and we got a credit for it! Hurray!

Thank you, AT&T!