Comic: Ick

Don't lie. You know exactly what I'm talking about.

Our bellybuttons are scars from when the umbilical cord fell off. Most people are "innies," like myself, with enchanting depressions in the abdomen. A small percentage are "outies," who have extra scar tissue from the umbilical cord. (Full Wikipedia article here.)

I vaguely recall Fragrant Mother instructing child-me to apply lotion to a Q-tip and swab around in there to clean it up, but, filthy tomboy that I was, I didn't really listen. I would allow years to pass before I looked down and went, "Oh yeah, maybe I should clean that, too!" and then promptly pass out from the eldritch horrors that I retrieved and inadvertently awoke from their microbial slumber.

This comic is about the last time that happened, aka last week. Ick.

This post brought to you by a rhinovirus! Ick^10.

Job Searching with Cats: Oscar

Oscar followed in the fine tradition of cat-blocking begun by Sheba. I suspect they both want me to stay homebound. Sheba likes having me around to pet her, while Oscar is charmed by the cheese I offer him as blood sacrifice treats.

Le sigh.

Job Searching with Cats: Sheba

This happened a couple of days ago.

I was in the middle of answering a typical interview question -- "Why do you want to work here?" -- when Sheba suddenly launched into a concert. I had petted and cuddled her beforehand to buy her silence during the call, but I guess it's never enough. She finally ran away after I made furious kicking gestures at her.

She did the same thing when I had another interview today, but this time I just kept moving around until she gave up following me and went to sleep on the couch.

Next comic: Oscar the ninja also gets in on the job-blocking action!

Training

Sheba usually gets the prize for stinkiest kitty, but Oscar gave her some serious competition this morning. We woke up to...kitty diarrhea. Everywhere. On our sheets, on the floor, the couch...UGH.

And Oscar sat right there, butt dripping the vile stuff. We had to chase him down and throw him into the tub so we could wash him. We left him in the bathroom to dry off. In revenge, he diarrhea'd some more on the floor and the bathroom mats. Awesome.

So basically: senior kitty = human baby.

Well, this certainly makes fiancé's birthday memorable. That and being sick as a dog. A souvenir from his bachelor party in Sin City! Thank Buddha for my Filipina Immunity To Everything (FITE).

Now I'm off to the gym, where the only stench comes from human sweat and yoga mats. Mmmm...

Minecraft

Fiancé discovered Minecraft a few months ago and became obsessed with it for a while. He started with the iPad game, to try it out, and bought the full version on his PC. For hours, he absorbed himself in his "interactive Lego land," and would proudly show me a glass house he created underwater, or some sky columns that served some mysterious, world-building purpose.

I was barely interested because the interface is blocky and everything is made up of nineties-looking 3D polygons, but he loves it. He even bought the XBox version so he could play with his nephew.

I suppose it was his turn to be mindlessly obsessed with something, because I did spend over a hundred hours playing Xenoblade Chronicles. Well, we're a nerd couple, it comes with the territory.

A note about comics: I chose not to renew my fragrantelephant.com site, because (a) I'm not trying to make money off my comics, and (b) I'd prefer to keep everything I have on one site that happens to be free (thanks, Google!). So around April 25, that site will redirect to this one, if I do what I'm supposed to do. In any case, the "Comics" section has my best work.

Happy Hump Day!

Sheba Wants to Love You

She likes people. But sometimes, when the sun is shining...

SHUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Danger! Deaf Kitty!

Facehugger

Inspired by Alien!

Compliment

Today's comic almost not brought to you by hangover. Hangover: it's a hammer to your head. 

Urgh...

Sleepless

A Blast from the Past

My Little Blog is Regular!

Comics will be uploaded on Wednesdays and Sundays. Also, due to popular demand, I will start drawing hair on my round-headed avatar. You may reimburse me for my hard work by admiring my comics for an extra 1.2 seconds.

Upcoming comics:
04/15/2012 -- "A Blast from the Past" -- A BOOBS employee writes to Faceless Employee after many months.
04/18/2012 -- "Sleepless" -- Cats are nocturnal, did you know?
04/22/2012 -- "Compliment" -- What not to do when comparing a woman to a flower.
04/25/2012 -- "Facehugger" -- You'll understand when you see the comic.

Obsessive organization brought to you by genes!

Ninja Cats

OSCAR: Traditional Cat Ninja

SHEBA: Secret Master Cat Ninja

A Game of What?

Boyfriend took me to PAX East for an entire weekend of gaming fun. Now, I used to think I was old school because I still played SNES games, but Boyfriend is a tabletop gamer. (= Dungeons & Dragons. ...No, no, don't run away!)

Moving on. We sat down to demo A Game of Thrones, and the rules confused me but I soldiered on because I knew that if I was good, Boyfriend would get me swag (stuff we all get, aka merchandise). We stopped the demo after a few turns because there was a girl at the table who was getting angrier by the second at her boyfriend, who kept ignoring her. She had no eyebrows, but made up for the fact by having pure hatred shoot out of her eyes. I am not even kidding.

If you haven't checked out A Game of Thrones the board game, don't. Just watch the HBO show, because at least then all the deception, betrayal, and incest are done by attractive people. Remember: beauty means never having to say you're sorry.

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming of cat comics. I might sneak in a slice-of-life puff piece here and there.

Happy Easter!

Fight!

 

Cat Alarm

Cat Love: Mommy vs Daddy

The Vicious Cycle

Today's comic is inspired by this article.

BLOG CHANGE: Whilst noodling around to find a template that would allow me to post the above image in its full, glorious 900 px size, I accidentally changed the whole blog layout. In the immortal words of Rick Perry: "Whoops."

Anyway, there are little whatsis on the right that you just hover your mouse over and it'll have the About section, the Archive, and some RSS thingiebob. This is Dynamic View, so you can use the upper left pull-down menu to change the layout of the entire blog if you want. I recommend the Sidebar view. If you're insulted that I'm explaining something so basic, that's because this entire paragraph is for my mom.

More comics soon!

Update, 05/25/2012: Changed my blog back to the Simple template. Boyfriend was relieved.

Starts with "Cat"

Butterfoot

Butterfoot, noun, (1) a person who falls down clumsily at every opportunity; (2) the equivalent of butterfingers, but for the feet; (3) me.

I've hurt my ankle a bunch of times: after hurtling into a cartwheel, playing barefoot soccer, etc. The latest was while hiking -- I managed to get a hairline fracture from rolling my ankle while... get this... walking on level ground! Hence the nickname "Butterfoot," handed down by my exasperated mother.

I wonder how I'll live up to the nickname this summer...