Retirement!

I quit my job this past summer. I'm now retired! (party dance)

^ IT ME
Image from Hill's

The truth is, I had been restless and unhappy in the office for months. I'd even gone to my doctor because I felt so burned out. My days consisted of getting myself and the kids ready to go, hitting the office, picking the kids up, preparing dinner while one or both of them screams for my attention, cleaning up after them, putting them to bed...It was exhausting. Despite that, I missed them when I was at my desk, and the best part of my work day was rushing off to pick them up from daycare.

I realized that I could manage a job and one child, but two mini-mes changed the game.

A comedienne once described a committee that lives in everyone's head: a group composed of voices shouting negative and discouraging things. My committee was asking me why I couldn't be a superwoman, someone who had a glittering career and still took on most of the child caring responsibilities. And finally, I shouted back: I'm done! I'm being called to full-time motherhood, for the first time in my life! And I will! Answer!

Everyone was very supportive of my decision, foremost being Fragrant Husband and Fragrant Mother. My boss and coworkers understood. Not so helpful: the admin manager who warned me thusly: "If I see a gap in someone's resume, I don't hire them." OK, cool.

And so here I am, half a year into my, well, let's call it semi-retirement. I now exercise regularly, the house is reasonably clean, and meal prep is still dicey, but no longer breakdown-inducing. I've learned to play hits like "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider" on the ukelele. When people ask me how my job is, I say the pay sucks, but I get great benefits. I'm happy. I'm content.

Spend my days adventuring with these cuties? YES PLEASE

What I'm trying to say, gentle readers, is that I'm retiring this blog. I've put in a solid decade of frequently pointless rambling on this site, and now I shall perhaps find a new creative outlet elsewhere. Hint: if you're on a movie or book or game review site and see the username fragrantelephant, it might be me?

TL;DR: Good night, and good luck. Fragrant Elephant out.

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This post brought to you by The Expanse! Read the books, watch the show, you inner you!

Jumping Ship: My Biannual Job Switch, 2015

According to trend pieces on popular internet sites, Millenials such as myself are supposed to switch careers regularly. Some of those articles delve into the economics behind our forced mobility, others fawn over our clear-eyed search for personal and professional fulfillment, and the grumpy ones call us a generation of lackadaisical bags of tweets and Instagram, harrumph harrumph. 

Whatever the case may be, change is constant, as evidenced by my most recent move away from One-Stop Wellness, Inc., which I joined right after our honeymoon. The reason for the switch can be summarized by a friend's observation: "People quit their bosses, not their jobs." I was so ready for a change that I handed in my resignation without even having a new job lined up. 

As luck would have it, a spot was open over at Healing Peanuts, Inc. (note: real organization names changed because ninja). I'd applied to that company before, and got turned down because I lacked experience with a specific grant-funding organization. This new opportunity was a similar gig -- and I still lacked that experience, by the way, but this time the description didn't call for it -- and so I sent in my resume and cover letter as I waited for the train. Ain't technology grand? 

That same morning, I got a call from their HR -- the very same person who'd interviewed me two years ago and gave me the rejection email after I followed up. We got right down to business: this is a part-time gig; this is the salary; haha no I need you to go up, sir, up; fine, come on in to chat with HR and the prospective new boss. 

So off I went. HR was short and sweet: "Hi, how's it going, do you know how to get to E Building? Here's a map, off you go." And I skipped merrily along, and did not get lost, I would like to emphasize this to my hubby (I get other people lost, not myself, serves them right for asking directions from the clueless-looking woman). 

The job interview itself was NBD. It was as though my new boss had looked at my sparkling resume and decided I was The One, and all I had to do was not fart during our conversation. Side note: Readers, I am very proud of my resume: it is clear, concise, and tailored to the job description. I work for this thang! 

Anyway, by the end of the chat, I had a verbal offer, and by the following week, had got the call from HR, who, succint as usual, opened with, "Done deal." This person is a treasure, I tell you. Two weeks after the interview, I was proudly wearing my new ID, and now I joyfully risk life and limb riding my bicycle through rush hour traffic. The whole process, from handing in my notice to starting my new job, took about six weeks. HECK YEAH. 

And thus another chapter begins...

TL;DR: I got a new job last month. 

This post brought to you by wi-fi! Wi-fi: you can live without it, but how else can you find out about important things, like if Waffle House serves pancakes?