Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Junior: 2nd Annual Report

Junior celebrated his second year quite recently, to the disbelief of strangers who have experienced his lengthy speeches about different types of trucks, speeches delivered at extreme close range, high volume, and with much spittle. In this report, I will briefly describe his many accomplishments to date, and propose areas for further exploration and development.

For a recap, Junior's first annual report is here.

1. Language Skills: Excellent
Junior's vocabulary building continues apace. He is capable of having vague conversations about items he has seen, such as trucks, trees, birds, trucks, insects, food, trucks, and also trucks. He can deliver multisyllabic phrases such as "Happy anniversary!" with love and sincerity. He recognizes superheroes and is keenly interested in Spider-man, possibly because he is attracted to the color red. In the photo below, he is modeling his Batman pajamas from his dear Auntie H. "That's Batman!" he replied, when asked to identify himself.

He can count to 20 in English (skipping 12 for some reason), to 10 in Tagalog, and is known to launch impromptu concerts in public with such hit singles as "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and "Row Row Row Your Boat." 

In terms of further language growth, he has begun to show an interest in written letters and numbers. His biggest issue is his Tagalog, which lags behind his English. We have invested in TFC (The Filipino Channel) for background language immersion and will update the Board of any observed gains.

2. Looks: Excellent

Junior continues to slay with his cuteness. His skin is baby-perfect, his hair is fabulous, and he takes good care of his teeth. Case in point: when he feels plaque, he alerts us and then stays still for flossing. According to our on-call expert*, his superhuman eyelashes are his best feature.


Junior also understands the importance of moisturizing, so he likes a dab of lotion and lip balm whenever mommy's having any. The longest lip balm has stayed on his lips before being licked off is 0.1s.

Because he has inherited much of his physical appearance from his father, Junior has a monobrow waiting to happen. Preliminary investigations reveal that the earliest one can wax a child is age nine. However, the Fragrant Household will have this discussion whenever Junior feels the need to bring it up, which we estimate will be around ages 13-16.

3. Temperament: Very Good
Junior is frequently pleasant and often camera-ready, as in the photo below:
However, since he is now in his Terrible Twos, there are times when he melts down when denied something desired. For example, when another child is riding a toy bulldozer in the playground, Junior will wail piteously at the top of his lungs, jump up and down to express his agony, and roll around on the ground just in case anyone doubts the excruciating pain he is undergoing at having to wait his turn. We are using the DIBS tactic -- Distract, Ignore, Bribe, and/or Shush -- to counter these tantrums. We are optimistic that Junior's inherent cheerfulness will eventually help us all surmount this trying period.

4. Appetite and Growth: Excellent
Junior requires, nay, demands full adult-size portions of fruits and grains. He consumes appropriate amounts of meat and vegetables, and is given sweets as a rare treat. 
He currently wears size 3T clothing and US 8 shoes (ahem ahem Christmas gifts). His latest growth spurt -- and resulting ravenous eating habits -- have resulted in noticeably fuller cheeks and a rounder stomach, which only serves to enhance #2 above.

We anticipate a steady progression of Junior's appetite and growth and have no issues to highlight for this report.

5. Sleep: Very Good
Junior's present sleeping habits are much improved from his first year. Two changes stand out: 1) his naps can now go up to three hours, and 2) he can sleep in as late as 7:00 AM.
Unfortunately, he still wakes up in the middle of the night and cries unceasingly for either mom or dad. We speculate that a stuffed truck might be able to comfort him during these times, and will be looking into this possible solution.

Junior's language skills, looks, appetite, and growth are all excellent. Meanwhile, his temperament has been downgraded to very good due to occasional tantrums. Finally, his sleep has improved to the very good level due to longer naps and sleep times.

Overall, Junior has progressed in a highly satisfactory manner, and we hope the Board agrees that showering him with love, affection, and gifts is fair recompense for all his hard yet seemingly effortless work.

We thank you again for supporting Junior and look forward to communicating his continuing excellence in our next reports.

Fragrant Elephant
Supreme Commander, Empress, Guardian of the Baby Gate, Keeper of the Chronicles, Mommy McBragface

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