Wednesday, March 18, 2015

A Message for the Easter Bunny

Dear Easter Bunny:

Hail and well met!

Lady Spring has finally cast her gaze upon us (or possibly her side eye). As I write this, the sun's rays beat down strongly upon the stalwart streets and buildings of beloved Boston, a counterpoint to the freezing winds that almost knocked the stroller out of my hands as my progeny complained in his sleeping bag-like contraption.

I know you're terribly busy laying chocolate eggs and burying them in places for good children to find, but I plead to you nonetheless, knowing that your mighty ears can hear the sound of one hand clapping as a butterfly flaps its wings on a branch and causes a typhoon in the Pacific. Verily, cause and effect and chaos are as sticks to you, to be ground underfoot as you hop to your next destination.

Hear the prayers of a new mother, Easter Bunny, ye who can conceive a second litter while still pregnant with the first!

Please let our humble home in the North End be sold this spring, it is nineteen hundred square feet with a private roof deck, priced a tad lower than current market valuations (what a deal!), and offers terrific views of the Zakim Bridge and Charlestown across the water!

Image credit: and The Boston Globe, Finishing the Big Dig Photo Gallery 

Let not the lack of elevator discourage the valiant, the pure, the heroic homebuyer who has excellent taste and good credit! Let this person's rewards be calves of steel, thighs of iron, and the lungs of Michael Phelps!

Please, o benevolent Easter Bunny, help us! Otherwise, our little one shall have to live in a laundry basket, like so:

Won't someone think of the children???

Yours in good health and nuttiness,
Fragrant Elephant

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