Vegetarian Nacho Salad

In honor of Reverend Cowherd, founder of the UK's first vegetarian church, I present this delicious and easy meat-free recipe.

FRAGRANT ELEPHANT'S VEGETARIAN NACHO SALAD
Serves Two!*

Ingredients:

• Black beans (8 oz.)
• Green leaf lettuce
• 1/2 cup salsa
• 1/4 of an onion and 1 tomato (chopped)
• Grated cheese (optional)
• Tostitos Blue Corn Chips

Instructions:

1. Cook the black beans. Once cooked, drain.
2. Put the beans back in the pan. Mix in the salsa, onion, and tomato.
3. Shred the green leaf lettuce.
4. Put the chips in a wide, shallow bowl. 
5. Add the lettuce on top.
6. Then add the bean mix.
7. If you want, add grated cheese.
8. Bask in the praise from your impressed victim fellow diner.

This meal has protein via beans, plus other nutrients from the lettuce and tomato. The raw onion adds bite. The cheese has calcium. Meanwhile, the chips save it from being completely healthy. Can't have too much of a good thing!

"I could eat this every day!"
-Fiancé 

*Bonus: Contains one serving of moral superiority for having a smaller ecological footprint than a beef dish!