Monday, October 31, 2011

Someone Please Slap Me

"Happy Monday!" I chirruped on gchat.

"blaaargh mondays are never happy," came the disgruntled reply from CatLadyHijab, not her real name, I just made that up, aren't I clever.

Basically the story this morning is that I came into my cute new sun-drenched office with its adorable dark blue wall and proximity to the kitchen and bathroom, which, of course, is what the ideal office should be, and I. Didn't. Want. To. Leave. "Oh noes!" I thought, "I would be abandoning my colleagues!" Not only that, I would be walking away from a picture-perfect commute -- a 10-minute stroll through pretty neighborhoods -- and a position where everyone up top is so overworked that I get no supervision, and can post random stuff like this!

Someone please slap me.

Fortunately, one of said colleagues walked in to chat, and I immediately 'fessed up to feeling mildly bad about leaving the new office. She gave me a dry look and said, "It's only the place that changed."

Ladies and gentlemen, the truth is like a slap in the face, or in this case, like a gentle tap between the eyes. You see, appearances are deceiving. While it looks like BOOBS is growing because of the current hiring frenzy... oh, hey, I should probably stop before someone evil finds this and sues me for everything in my bank account! You'll never get my money! Because I don't have any! Mwa-ha-haaaaa!!!

I am pleased to say that I'm leaving on a positive note (knock on wood, hope this lasts until Thursday!). My coworkers, having for some reason found out that I love cats because I gush about Sheba every single day, got me cat-themed goodbye stuff -- like this card ("You reign supreme", it says); and a tiny cat calendar! Wouldn't it be awesome if I owned a cat that small? I could put it in my pocket! Oh, wait, those things are called hamsters and they smell bad and they bite. Wow, they're almost like cats! Just add self-centered craftiness.

Brief weekend update: IT SNOWED. Boyfriend and I sloshed through icy water on the streets last Saturday, ugh. I should've worn my winter boots. Sunday was better -- sunny, but damn cold. Now it's not as bad.

Well, back to the grind -- not. Kweheheheheheh!!!!!