Friday, September 9, 2011

An Invitation to Join BOOBS

Dear friend,

I am writing to formally invite you to join the Best Organization Of Boston Society (BOOBS) Board of Directors. Let me say once again how pleased I am that you so have so generously supported us despite our recent blatant disregard for law, ethics, fairness, and worker's rights. Due to numerous reports of your unpopularity in your own country, we believe that you would make a wonderful addition to the BOOBS Board of Directors.

The remainder of this letter sets forth several logistical and corporate matters:

            Term – In accordance with the Society’s by-laws, you have been elected to a one-year term, and you will be eligible to be voted in again, depending on our mood at the time.

            Conference Calls – The Board holds daily conference calls that generally last for five minutes, which is the time it takes for us to rubber-stamp everything put before us by the CEO of BOOBS.

Corporate Documents – For your reference, the following documents are included in this package:

·       1,000-page self-published autobiography by the CEO of BOOBS 
·       The Society’s Certificate of Incorporation
·       A memorandum from the law firm of Slowest Lawyers on Earth LLP, outlining the scope of liability for members serving on the Society’s Board
·       A list of your fellow Board members and their contact information
·       A binder with printouts of all the speeches ever made by the CEO of BOOBS

Please contact us if you have any questions. Thank you for your many efforts on behalf of BOOBS, and we look forward to working together with you as we move forward.

With all best wishes,
Board of Directors, BOOBS